Just-talking-out-loud

Some notes from July 06 Saying goodbye to this beautiful city is hard. I had the time of my life here. No matter what time of the year; when I would look out of my bedroom window, I could see green trees. I never got tired of this view or the view of downtown Vancouver from one of the bridges. I always admired the cherry blossoms on the Lower Mall and always held my breath when I was looking at the water and mountains from the Rose Garden. I have met some of the most interesting and not so interesting people here. I found friendship in people I least expected. I also got to know myself better. I never thought I would attach to a place again. You would think when you move a lot and leave your friends behind for couple of times, you get use to it. But that hasn’t happened to me yet. I guess it never will. I got emotional as I said goodbye to some of my friends. I want to be excited for the start of a new chapter in my life but it seems more that I’m living in a denial. I don’t even feel ...

You get to meet some people whom you are intimidated by for some reasons or the other or you admire their confidence. You think they have every thing figured out. Then you get to hang out with them more and get to know them better, and then you realize they are just like you are. Everyone can be insecure at one point in his/her life. We are all growing up; no matter how old we are. So the question is why should we let them influence us?

Vancouver Buddhist Temple, 2008- A true calm peaceful place Today my boss told me that I look calm all the time. I think she meant that as a complement because she added that it was very good to work with people who are calm. I told her that I did not usually show what was going on with me (which is true). Then I said that I did not have any reason to be stressed out (which was not entirely true) . Anyway, this conversation made me wonder about what people may think about other people’s lives and circumstances just by the way they react daily. Life has ups and downs and all of us are going through the same thing at some level / at some point. No one has the prefect life. I always pity jealous people. Not only they think superficially but they self-pity themselves for not having the life of others. It seems that they are in a bubble. Completely absorbed in their own lives that blinded them to see beyond what is really there. Jealousy will also lead to miss any good thins that happ...

Shoreline ,1936 by Emily Carr- Photo from McMichael Canadian Art Collection- Vancouver Art Gallery This past week has been chilly but sunny. It’s made me to enjoy the September breeze as I walk in my favourite neighbourhood. It's nice to not drag myself out of the bed every morning because I'm excited about starting a new day. It's nice when I go to bed every night, I'm so tired that I fall asleep right away. It's nice to be busy again with challenges and to be able to enjoy them. Not much is happening but a lot is new to keep me occupied.

Flirting comes naturally to some people. I'm not one of them...

After such a long absent, I'm back. I've moved, unpacked, and organized a ton of papers. I think it's safe to say that I'm ready for a new term. Yesterday was the moving day here on campus. There were cars and people everywhere. You could feel the energy. It was fun to watch people trying to find their way around the campus. As I was walking by the bookstore on campus, I saw new freshmen with their parents waiting in the line to get their student ID. I thought of these students when they started the elementary school. The first day of school, they were accompanied by their parents. Now, 18 years later, they are coming to university and again they are with their parents. I thought that might be a good thing for parents to realize that no matter how old your kids are they always need you.

By living with others, you get to know yourself better. I am who I am and I don't want to change some stuff about myself. I like myself for those qualities that some people think they can never find in others.

It just hit me that there was a time in my life that I was living in the past, surrounded by all sort of nostalgia. I never thought of living in a better place, in a better time, and actually enjoying my life. Now I have another problem. I live for the future.

On Dialogue or as I like to call it "the secret to the social reconciliation" It took me longer to gather my thoughts and write about this book than to read the book itself. Anyway I managed to do both. I believe this isn't a book that you should read once. I know that I need to read it over and over to be able to develop my personality based on its concept. To me, this book is a guideline to self-awareness. It helped / will be helping me to be aware of my mind, my thoughts, and my roles not as an individual in the society but as a member of my society. In the next two paragraphs, I've picked some of the most enlightening phrases from the book. I've quoted Bohm directly from his book for those who are not familiar with the concept of Bohm Dialogue . According to Bohm, "the word Dialogue means “a stream of meaning and ideas” among a group of people. It is possible that it occurs even within one person’s head (from page 7). …While Discussion is like a ping-po...